Overwhelmed or Underwhelmed?

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A Woman who lives with the stress of an overwhelmed schedule, will often ache with the sadness of an Underwhelmed soul’~ Lysa TerKeurst.

I am tired. I tell everyone, I am tired.

I am feeling overwhelmed, I have been here before, the people pleaser in me is trying to keep all the plates spinning, The clutter in my house is due to me offering to help a friend, I feel stifled by it. I am going to a Wedding at the Weekend which I am not even a teeny bit prepared for, what the Hell am I going to wear? I am already stressed out at the thought of leaving the puppies overnight. The car is misbehaving, I need to book it into the garage, Life is super busy but I am getting nowhere fast, like a hamster on a wheel. I appreciate in the grand scale of things, life aint that bad! I get the whole gratitude thing believe me, I do count my blessings every day, and yet I am fraying at the edges.

I watched the very Beautiful Royal Wedding on Saturday, who could not be touched by this wonderful union between our very own Prince Harry and the beautiful Doe eyed Meghan? I felt very emotional, yet a part of me (the bitchy part clearly) thought ‘ That lucky Bitch will never ever have to do laundry again.’ Oh Dear. Laundry and I have a very tense relationship, The ironing basket is teetering almost at falling point, I totally resonate with Erma Bombeck and her  famous quote .

My second favorite household chore is ironing, The first being, hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint’

When will it get done? do I even care?

So…..Rant over, what should I do? I am not alone, I know this, we live in a society whereby we expect too much of ourselves and allow others to expect too much from us. As a Therapist I am constantly preaching about self care, Time to look a bit closer to home and take some of my own advice.

The answer is really very simple.Firstly, Say No. Learn how to say No and mean it, Say No to feeling guilty about the damn housework, going to bed early with a book, cancelling a night out to stay home and watch netflix! drop the guilt!

Secondly, make a list, prioritize your week, what is absolutely essential and what can you totally ditch? (Ironing obviously)

Lastly, maybe, just maybe we allow ourselves to become overwhelmed because we are rather underwhelmed with life ( See the opening quote above!) What do you love to do, but don’t actually have the time for these days? yesterday I baked, in my silly little kitchen with only Nina Simone for company, I baked a coconut cake and scones, made tiny little sandwiches on vintage plates, and we all had a rather lovely afternoon Tea! I haven’t done that for so long and it was perfect. I love to write, yet I am not finding the time, Make the time Woman!

There are Twenty four hours in a day, according to my ‘fitbit’ I spend on average seven hours sleeping ( Another thing I have become a slave to! it reminds you when you need to get up and walk, no wonder I am shattered!) that leaves me approximately seventeen hours a day. Surely I can organise them wisely?

Or I could tackle the ironing.

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Every Picture…..

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When I was around Eight years old I was taken on a Caravan Holiday, by my Wonderful Grandma( to the right of the above pic) and her Sister, whom I called ‘Auntie Elsie’ ( Great Aunt really) This Photo came to light a few weeks ago, whilst rummaging through my Mothers huge stash of Family photos, almost instantly I was transported back to that week with two women whom were such a Massive part of all of our lives, not just mine, so much so that I am in the process of writing their story….. watch this space!

My Grandma lost her own Mother when she was just Eight years old, Elsie was a newborn, the family were separated and went to stay with various relatives, but nobody really wanted a new Baby, times were hard, families were large enough and sadly Elsie ended up at Nazareth House Orphanage, from there she went to a Convent in Carlisle. My Grandmother fought most of her life to get her home, Elsie would be forty three years old before that happened, And yet the bond between these two Sisters was undeniably strong, as though they had been together every day of their lives.

My feelings when I looked at the photograph, were ones of joy, I remembered the lemon shaped soap that we washed with, Grandma had bought it especially for our Holiday from Fenwicks, her cardigan that she wrapped around my shoulders when it was chilly at night, shell collecting with Auntie Elsie, nightly games of Bingo for pennies and watching Elsie crochet with silks she told me, were the colour of spring crocus. Yardleys Freesia dabbed on my wrists by Grandma. Sleeping in between them and the three of us giggling like schoolgirls long into the night, early morning cups of tea and having my hair brushed whilst listening to the constant chatter, Oh how I wish I had taken notes! They were tremendously funny!

Of course these beautiful souls have been long passed, but every now and then, my own Mum will say to me and laugh ‘ You are so like your Grandma!’ usually when I have said something a bit inappropriate!

I am honoured to have been even slightly influenced by you both ladies.

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